The Assemblies’ stupid missionary system.

For a movement that believes in indigenous churches, we sure do make our missionaries dependent upon the homeland.

Since I started ranting about missionaries in the last entry, I’ll follow that up in this one.

I greatly disapprove of a missionary system that reduces apostles of God to traveling beggars. The Assemblies of God’s belief is a valid one—if God really has called you to minister somewhere, he’ll provide the finances. How that’s supposed to work is that God simply provides the finances: Someone gives you money to get there; a job opens up in the place where you’re sent; locals come to assist you and chip in for expenses; you get favor from the local government… You know, like Barnabas, Paul, Silas, or Priscilla. The ancient system worked. It ain’t broke.

But the way that the Assemblies, and many an Assemblies missionary, puts this concept into practice is by going to church after church and preaching a missions sermon for money. It’s the equivalent of a freakin’ street performer. God called them to minister, not to be dancing monkeys. The idea of “furlough” is also one I disapprove of. I can understand a brief vacation—a few weeks to visit family and friends, relax, unwind, etc. Instead I have known missionaries who have spent up to a year in the States, begging for financial and prayer support, when they should be in their adoptive homelands, ministering. They should not be forced to visit us; we should be visiting (and assisting) them.

The disgruntled missionary.

Badmouthing churches behind their back isn’t gonna generate you goodwill, fella.

Class at Coffee Cat last night was interesting… I always approve of having class in coffeehouses. I can have a few cups… then on the way back to campus, I can stop by Starbucks… Hey, relax, it’s all decaf.

I showed up early, as usual, and ran into a classmate (from a different class) who was there with some of his family. Apparently his nephew, who was there, is an Assemblies of God missionary to the Philippines. When he found out I’m a member of Vaca Valley Christian Life Center, he proceeded to bitch about my church.

(This is not the way you gain support, by the way. Future missionaries, take note. I could be a deacon for all he knows; I’m not, but if I were, he would be even less likely to get financial support from the ministries I’m involved with. Not with that attitude.)

Stupid Internet Survey: The Dante's Inferno Test.

The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to Purgatory! Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
level	score
Purgatory (repenting believers)	extreme
Level 1: Limbo (virtuous nonbelievers)	high
Level 2 (lustful)	low
Level 3 (gluttonous)	moderate
Level 4 (prodigal and avaricious)	very low
Level 5 (wrathful and gloomy)	very low
Level 6: The City of Dis (heretics)	very low
Level 7 (violent)	very low
Level 8: The Malebolge (fraudulent, malicious, panderers)	moderate
Level 9: Cocytus (treacherous)	very low
Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

Why would the boss need to give us a resumé?

There are now three blogs I've seen that contain this “resumé of Jesus Christ.” Naturally, Jesus never wrote it because he would never write anything so cheesy. It proposes that Jesus is applying for the position of Lord and lists a whole bunch of proof-texts to show why he would be great for the job. Like any other resumé, it's heavily padded in favor of the positive and skips over the negative, which is quite unlike Jesus, who never pulls punches:

• You want to follow me, you have to deny yourself and take up your cross. [Mt 16.24, Mk 8.34, Lk 9.29]
• You will suffer persecution. [Jn 16.33] But it's all good. [Mt 5.11] Love your persecutors anyway. [Mt 5.44]
• If you have lots of stuff, it will hinder you to the degree that it’s more likely to shove a camel through a needle than for you to get into the kingdom, Lk 18.24-25] which contrary to popular interpretation, is not a metaphor. (And it can be done, with a very powerful food processor.) You can't serve God and wealth, Mt 6.24, Lk 16.13] so get off this idea that God wants everyone to be wealthy. I already told you there will always be poor people. Mt 26.11, Mk 14.7, Jn 12.8] The TV preachers who tell you otherwise are only trying to justify their greed.
• Prophets get no honor in their homeland. Mt 13.57, Mk 6.4, Jn 4.44] Maybe you should leave.
• Stop sinning. Jn 5.14, 8.11, 1Co 15.34] Be perfect like your Father in heaven. Mt 5.48] Again, not a metaphor; and stop using that excuse that all have sinned. Those verses Ro 3.23, 5.12, 1Jn 1.8-10] are in past tense for a reason. No one who truly abides in me sins. 1Jn 2.6, 3.9, 5.18]
• I told you to make disciples, Mt 28.19] not get people to say the sinners’ prayer or some other “magic words,” then abandon them to figure everything else out on their own. Stop leaving my sheep behind for the wolves to prey upon. Your job is not done until you have adequately trained them to likewise make disciples.

Naturally there are others, each a Rant in itself.

But the dopey bit is that this so-called resumé presumes that anyone would apply to a person to be their boss. Jesus never had to apply for his job; making the universe automatically puts him in charge of it, and dying for it shows he deserves to be in charge of it.

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter. Christ is risen.

Someone asked me, “You want to go to a sunrise service?” I thought about it and responded, “I suppose I could stay up that late…” Instead, I went to Mass.

Mass was at Holy Cross in Santa Cruz (for those outside the area, the church that the town is named after). It was my first Mass since childhood, and my sister’s first Mass ever. It was a lot like I remember… sort of. My previous experience has been in Air Force chapels, which are never as nicely decorated or attended. Today was standing room only, which is what we get for arriving on time.

Because it was Mass, I figured I should wear a tie. I really dislike ties. Ties are not of God. They were invented to suck up to kings, and evolved into a cultural standard that represents conformity, a lack of individuality, and the approval of shallow people who only look at people’s outsides—four things that are not of God. Plus I don’t like wearing stuff on my neck; it cuts off circulation to the brain, and God wants us to use our brains, so that’s a fifth thing. I could list more…

I didn’t take communion. I haven’t been confirmed and didn’t feel it was appropriate. Not that I’m not a member of the body of Christ; but the Catholics have a procedure to formally confirm that people are Christians before they participate in the Eucharist. If you believe—as they do—that the hosts and wine literally turn into Jesus, you can understand why they’re worried that anyone take it in an unworthy manner and call condemnation on themselves, as Paul puts it in 1 Corinthians. (I often feel Protestants don’t take communion seriously enough. Maybe the bread and wine don’t literally become Jesus; but as symbols of Jesus, they deserve proper reverence because of the person they represent.) Eucharist is the central point of Mass, and it’s a serious business. So if I’m at their church, it’s appropriate for me to respect their beliefs. I didn’t have to go to a Catholic service, after all. If I ever go again, I should probably get confirmation out of the way so I can fully participate.

Lent is over, so I can eat bagels again… which I did for lunch. God bless Noah’s Bagels, and whoever figured out you could put Asiago cheese in a bagel.

The hall is once again filling up with students, and the noise level is back to normal. So much for peace.

Watching Christian movies.

Kent’s Recommended Watch:
Mel Gibson:
The Passion of the Christ

Saw The Passion of the Christ again tonight at church. They announced it by saying, “Come at seven; we’ll have some popcorn made and some refreshments…” I thought: This is not a popcorn movie. If you can eat popcorn through this movie, there’s something wrong with you.

It’s not that the movie itself is so good that it emotionally picks you up and body-slams you. It is a good movie in itself; and there are lots of horror movies with more gore. The difference is that this is someone I know. Put it this way: If you were watching your best friend getting beaten to death before your eyes, it would freak you out. And lots of Christians consider Jesus to be their best friend, or their Lord, or at least the guy that they talk about so much at church that they recognize the pastor is fond of him. So it’s traumatic. But it certainly helps you appreciate him.

(And, I’ve found, The Passion had led me to appreciate Jesus’s mom more. Protestants tend to underplay her contribution to his life and ministry because we feel the Roman Catholics overdo it; but under-appreciating her isn’t the solution. She was a really brave woman; and you’d have to be a strong woman in order to raise God.)

Kent’s Recommended Watch:
Brian Dannelly:
Saved!

And, just for contrast, I also saw Saved! today, which almost gave me flashbacks from my high school youth group. (Heck, there are some people at Bethany who are like that… but I won’t name names. Y’all know who you are.) Yeah, I remember my early days as a young Christian hypocrite… figuring that God’s will was for every Christian to be successful, and popular, and eventually make lots of money so we could help get conservative anti-abortion candidates elected to office. (Because that was the only issue we cared about; screw the poor and homeless, they did it to themselves.) Fortunately, God saved me from that too.

So, an interesting Good Friday…

Abraham Lincoln died on Good Friday too, you know.

A little peace and quiet for Easter.

Ahh… for once, I don’t hear the sound of thumping in the floor above me. Nearly everyone’s gone home for Easter.

This is, I think, the first Easter I haven’t spent with my family. No, wait… it’s the second. I will see my sister, who will be in town this evening; but she’s not primarily here to see me. She’s here to visit friends and show off her boyfriend. Priorities, you see.

With no school tomorrow, everyone’s in Friday mode. Party now; go home (if it’s within driving or flying distance) in the morning.

So I’m watching The Apprentice in our lounge and D comes in to invite me to a birthday party. I declined. I don’t know the birthday girl; if anything I am a casual acquaintance who had a class with her once, and I’m fine with leaving that the way it is. Plus, I don’t feel it’s right to crash someone’s party simply because you know other guests. Worst of all, they were going bowling.

I find that there are a lot of people, on this campus and elsewhere, that are so desperate for a social life that they will hang out with people they don’t know, simply so they can say they did something over the weekend. I’m not talking about just meeting someone and partying with them. I’ve done that; depending on the person, it can either be a lot of fun or a scene out of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. But I’m talking about the fools who would rather be with "cool" people than with friends, and don’t care (or do care, but are willing to settle for it) if they’re ignored all evening.

Screw that. I’d rather watch TV.