My current events. And Niners suck.

I returned to campus today. L brought me, after first fixing his brakes, then discovering one of the rotors is cracked, then as we came up Scotts Valley Drive one of his tires went flat. So the trip sucked for him. I lent him lots of money to take care of these things, and he hates to borrow money, so this was a big step for him, but he’ll get over it.

Grandma went home today, after spending about five days in a row griping about the cold. She lives in Phoenix. Out of curiosity, I looked up Phoenix’s weather and discovered the weather is exactly the same as northern California’s; they’re going through a cold spell. Ha HA! It is a little annoying, though, having the heater cranked up to 75° Fahrenheit and having to wear jackets and socks because she’s cold. I’m much happier in my cold little dorm room.

I was also amused with this morning’s sports page; the Forty-Niners are now 1-10 and bottom of the league. I commented to my sister, “Now they officially suck.”

If you find that statement annoying or offensive, I remind you—they’re in last place. If last place doesn’t suck, something’s wrong with your judgment.

Mike pointed out that maybe this is part of their strategy to get the first-round draft pick next season; and there might be something to that idea.

More obnoxious behavior.

Sucky Christmas present: Next semester’s textbooks.

“Merry Christmas. Have a textbook. You’ll thank me later.”

How my Thanksgiving went.

Thanksgiving was good. Went home to visit the family. L drove me, and stuck around for Thanksgiving. Got to visit with family and family’s significant others. And L.

L’s a great guy, and he’s been my friend for years. But because he’s homeless, this weirded out Mom a little. However, Mom got to know him, and now she has no problem with him, as I expected. Mom's cool.

Grandma will take a lot more work; and she’s too set in her ways to change. Unfortunately, a lot of those ways annoy me. Her anti-Mexican bigotry, her passive-aggressive comments, her obsessive fascination with celebrity gossip, her complaints that I never wear shoes, and her obvious favoritism towards me at the exclusion of my siblings, all bug me. I love her, but her anti-intellectual habits don’t make it easy.

I haven’t got a lick of homework done this weekend, which isn’t good. Dead week should be insanely busy. I’m only up to chapter 11 in Bill Clinton’s autobiography; it’s interesting. But so much of my time has been spent watching movies I’ve seen already. I feel like I’m wasting time here; I guess this would be a better vacation if I didn't have so much still to do.

But on the negative side… internet access sucks without broadband. I’ve been spoiled.

About the music.

Kent’s Recommended Listen:
U2:
How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb

The new U2 album rocks. So does iTunes.

Loneliness 𝘪𝘴 curable, you know.

I get to go to Vacaville for Thanksgiving, which is very cool ’cause I get to see the family. So I can kind of understand how come so many people are writing blogs and emails about how they’re lonely and that sucks. Indeed it does.

I don’t mean to crap all over anyone’s misery, but often loneliness is a person’s own bloody fault. Every lonely period I have ever been through has been entirely because I was, at the time, a miserable bastard. I was too caustic, sarcastic, passive-agressive, foul-mouthed, self-centered, greedy, needy. Not even God wanted to talk to me. I didn’t even like myself; why on earth would anyone else disagree? I had to take inventory of my life, eliminate the characteristics that I didn’t like, and become the person I wanted to be—someone more like Jesus.

I don’t presume to know a lot of the bloggers. Some of them may think they know me because they’ve read my Rants and assume this is what I’m like. (This, in spite of my disclaimers that Rants are my way of letting off steam, and that in real life I’m a lot nicer, wittier, and more handsome.) I don’t know if you’re alone because your personality resembles old mayonnaise. I hope not. I simply find, through personal experience, that this is often true.

And I find it ridiculous that such people regularly defend themselves with, “That’s not true. I’m not like that. My other friends think I’m great.” First they complain that they’re alone; then they defend themselves by referring to friends. Aren’t these the same friends who aren’t around? True friends warn you about your flaws; false ones make fun of them behind your back.

Stupid internet questionnaire.

And now, some personal information that you can only find out through Internet spam.

Here’s a questionnaire my brother sent me once. I like this better than the last superficial list of likes/dislikes I posted.

1. Last movie you saw in a theater. Ray.
2. What book are you reading now? Catch Me If You Can by Frank W. Abegnale. Better than the movie. (The book usually is.) Finished Elmer Gantry Friday.
3. Favorite board game. “Mr. Leslie Gets to Mess With Your Head,” which I invented. After that, I suppose Outburst.
4. Favorite magazine. Christianity Today.
5. Favorite smells. Brewing coffee. Pine incense. Clean laundry.
6. Comfort foods. Cheez-its. Pea soup. Mom’s enchiladas.
7. Worst feeling in the world. Knowing the trouble I’m in is my own bloody fault.
8. First thing you think of when you wake up. Where’s the %$#@ snooze button?
9. Favorite fast food place. Quizno’s. Pizza My Heart. McDonald’s.
10. Future child’s name. Jesus. Why aren’t there any Anglo kids named Jesus?
11. The most important thing in life. Loving God and one another. I know, Jesus said it first and it sounds like the perfect Christian answer, but I’ve come to believe it’s quite true.
12. If I had lots of money I would… pay off loans. Then I could do whatever I wanted and not worry about an income.
13. Favorite collectable. Jazz CDs. Bible reference books.
14. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? No. But I do have some.
15. Storms: Cool or scary? Neither. Annoying.
16. First car. A Honda CVCC that my Dad figured he could teach me to drive, so he put it in my name. It never really was mine. I don’t drive.
17. Favorite color. Green. Either hunter or kelly; sometimes lime.
18. Do you eat the stems of broccoli? Yes.
19. If you could dye your hair any color, it would be: Strawberry blonde; it’s the only other color that looks natural on me. I have made it that color a few times.
20. In how many states have you lived? California and Texas.
21. In how many cities have you lived? Seven: San Jose, Houston, Hayward, Vacaville, Sacramento, Dixon, Scotts Valley, Grass Valley.
22. Favorite place to relax. My room.
23. Favorite sports to watch. Basketball. Football. Rugby.
24. One nice thing about the person who gave you this. Chad Leslie is one of the coolest guys I know; and “cool” is a term I seldom use about people.
25. What is under your bed? Mike Venegas’s bed.
26. Of the people you’ll send this to, who will likely respond first? Heck if I know. This is a blog, not email. People can copy this list all they like.
27. Least likely? Mom. She’s not on Xanga and it’s hard enough to get her to write email.
28. Whom do you hate? I don’t hate people. They may annoy me sometimes, but I reserve hatred for only inanimate objects. I cannot hate what God loves. Not even the devil.

More on Elmer Gantry.

There’s lots of ends-justify-the-means behavior in both Elmer Gantry and Christianity.

Still reading Elmer Gantry. I reached the section of the book that they made into the movie. The whole book wasn’t made into the movie; just one interesting little segment of it. Guess the producers thought the book was too long.

Of course, some things got changed for the movie. In the movie, Elmer is a salesman and con man who passes himself off as a pastor and gets involved with a revival. In the book, Elmer is a pastor—he cons himself into becoming one, mainly for the power that comes with it, and since he believes he’s actually doing people some good, he has no trouble adding con man techniques to his salvation messages. Hence the book is a little more disturbing than the movie.

There’s a lot of ends-justify-the-means attitude in the book. Elmer has no problem with making up testimonies and decorating the revival tent with bogus crutches if it will win souls. Unfortunately, I’ve known too many people who have “spiced up” their testimonies because they think a dramatic conversion will get people’s attention better than “I grew up Christian.” Sad but true; and more common than you think. (Unless you’re one of those people with an embellished testimony; then it may surprise you to learn you’re not the only hypocrite.)

What’s with the petition?

This isn’t how Christians are meant to deal with problems.

It’s not easy to tell this story without dropping names or hints, but I’m gonna give it a shot. Two guys, roommates, are not getting along. The solution, they figured, was for one of them to exchange rooms with another person. Sound reasonable? Except that some buttinsky figures the wrong roommate is exchanging rooms, and has drafted a petition—which he asked me to sign—to express this to our Resident Director. He picked the wrong guy. Last time I encountered such a petition, it was meant to get me fired. I’m not a big fan of the “strength in numbers” mentality; it got my Rabbi killed. Besides, there were a lot of steps bypassed in order to put together this petition. Most places actually have a procedure to address grievances; Jesus even has one. First you go to the person; then you go to the RA, then the RD, and only after that point would I feel comfortable signing any such petition. But people don’t want procedure; they want quick, ego-shattering, relationship-damaging results. Really, they want vengeance, and nothing provides a better passive-agressive assault than a big list of names telling someone to go f--- himself. Unfortunately, the typical response to an assault is either a savage fight or a bitter surrender. (My response to the petition against me? Fortunately, I and my bosses were mature enough to handle it properly. I let God—and my bosses—deal with it, and kept my job.) I shouldn’t get so annoyed at immaturity. I’ve encountered enough of it; you’d think I’d be anesthetized to it by now.

Interesting read: Elmer Gantry.

Kent’s Recommended Read:

Sinclair Lewis:
Elmer Gantry

---

So the characters in Elmer Gantry nitpick the bible. Doesn’t shake my faith any.

I downloaded Elmer Gantry from the internet and am reading it off my pocket PC. But click on that book cover if you’d rather have it on Kindle.

So far it’s nothing like the movie. I just got past the bit where the “Christers” are trying to save Elmer, and his atheist roommate keeps quoting Thomas Paine and Robert Ingersoll at him.

I’ve read Paine and Ingersoll. They have a lot of good points about iffy portions of the bible. They spend more time ridiculing it than asking honest questions; and that’s mainly because they don’t have honest questions; they just want to rip on the bible. So let them have their fun; it doesn’t disturb me any. My relationship with God isn’t based on the bible. It’s based on God.

I get in trouble whenever I say that, so let me clarify.

I greatly respect the bible. I believe it to be inspired and quote from it often. I believe God’s character is well-reflected in its pages. As so many Christians point out, the bible points us to God. However, the bible is no substitute for God, and regardless of how much I may respect the bible, I don’t confuse the two. When God tells me something and it’s not in the bible, I don’t respond, "That’s not in the bible, so that’s not from God." If I were to do that, my god would be the bible.

I get in trouble with Fundamentalists whenever I say that, but that’s only because the truth can hurt.

𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘭 drama at Bethany College.

Watched the school play. Some was good, some bad. Same as usual.

Saw “Arsenic and Old Lace” yesterday. I found it very amusing.

…It is hard to fairly critique a production when you know many of the people in it. Some of the actors were very good. Others… well, the usual complaints are

1. some people recited lines or shouted, instead of acting;
2. some too obviously showed their anxiousness to hit the cues;
3. the motivation of some characters were obviously unexamined;

and anything more specific and I'd be naming names.

But you find this sort of thing when you have people who aren't so much interested in being better actors as they are interested in being involved in a spectacle. It's the difference between, say, Anthony Hopkins and Shaquille O'Neal.

It's why I did plays. I'm a lousy actor because I like to get attention too much. Some would say that therefore I'm in no position to critique other actors; which is baloney. Having talent and recognizing talent are two different things; you don't need to have both.

Some of it I found unintentionally amusing. The all-female police force, for example. I know; there are always more women trying out for parts than men (especially at Bethany College, where there are more women in general). This is the sort of thing that makes it obvious how male-dominated most plays are.

Then there were the anachronistic music selections played before the play and during intermission; but I'm nit-picking.

But to end this positively: Most of the prominent parts are played by good actors, and that largely makes the play worthwhile. And, from what I hear by those in a position to know, they get better with each performance. So if you haven't seen it yet, do.

A side rant: It's too bad that school productions limit themselves to three or four productions; I think they should perform for at least two weekends, just in case one weekend or the other is poorly timed. Why go to all that work for such a brief payoff when you can extend the payoff?

Maybe we should meet at homecoming.

Classmates wanna meet? That’s what homecoming is for.

It’s strange; since I came back to Bethany I keep bumping into old friends that I went to school with back in the ’90s. Some of them just never left. (Which is actually quite sad.) Others of them did leave, but I bump into them anyway.

I was talking to H recently, who lives in southern California. He’d like to visit but in order to make the trip worthwhile he wants to visit lots of people. I suggested homecoming. By golly, there’s an actual use for homecoming!

True, this is the sixth year since I graduated; but I’m roping up old friends for it, no matter what year they graduated. Thus far, only five people are interested, but with enough publicity more will come. So, old friends, mark off Friday and Saturday, February 4-5, 2005 on your calendar, tell your friends, then email me if you’re coming. I’ll post a list of attendees on my website.

Good Lord, I’m turning into a publicity shmuck.

Stupid joke.

“Isn’t “xanga” onomatopoeia for pocket pool?” —M.

Two rants about whiny veterans and whiny lefties.

If the veterans want their own holiday, fine. They get the day off. The rest of us will go to work.

I’m a little annoyed at the veterans for demanding that, and having, Veterans Day put on some day other than Monday. I want three-day weekends, dangit. Every federal holiday should be moved to Monday. Yet the veterans whined, “But then nobody will pay enough attention to us,” so now they get their day today.

I think Veterans Day would be more appropriate if only the veterans got the day off. If they move it to Monday, they can even have the three-day weekend they’re depriving the rest of us from having. The rest of us who didn’t do our civic duty to fight for our country can just go to work as usual. We’ll celebrate some other holiday, like Jurors Day or Voters Day or Taxpayers Day; something everyone can celebrate (unless you dodge jury duty, don’t vote, and don’t file taxes). We can put it in August because that month needs a holiday. We don’t need two holidays in November anyway.

Deadhead humor.

What does a Deadhead say at a Grateful Dead concert once he runs out of weed?

“Man, this band sucks!”

Bad, 𝘣𝘢𝘥 worship leaders!

Leaders are supposed to lead. Even if they’re busy singing and playing the piano.

Another pet peeve: Worship leaders who worship more than they lead.

Trouble is, whenever I bring this up, people think I’m talking about the people who just recently led worship. Admittedly, they brought this up; but not everything I’m about to rant on was practiced by them. They just happened to have sparked me. And I know the job isn’t easy; but there are some things that every worship leader ought to remember to do.

Repentant Episcopals, sarcasm and vagueness.

The Episcopals repent of idolatry, but don’t deal with their core problems.

Good news—

I ranted about the Episcopal Church endorsing idolatry. Some Episcopal pastors with a connection to pagan churches had put together a liturgy encouraging worship of another god. In response to a whole lot of criticsm, they’ve recently repented and recanted their activities with the pagans.

The only down side to this is that the leadership of the church needs to take responsibility for its actions—and it hasn’t done so yet. Likely leadership will figure that since the pastors repented, the issue is over with. If only that were true.

And now, a brief moment of sarcasm: Yeah, right we’ll only be working on the yearbook for an hour.

Amusing website: The Holy Observer.

God bless The Holy Observer; sometimes we just gotta laugh at ourselves.

Take a glance at a few more:

• "Welcome, Semi-Annual Worshippers"
• "Come look at our asses"
• "Going to church won’t save your soul!"
• "Backslider amnesty until 8/31"
• "Hungover? No problem!"
• "Going to church won’t save your soul!"
• "There’s no A/C in hell!"
• "Saddam, Jesus loves you…"
• "Think you might be going to hell?"

Of course, some of them look fake to me. For all I know, they’re all fake. But they’re funny.

Wanna buy an electric piano?

Kent’s Recommended Watch:
Taylor Hackford:
Ray

Saw Ray at the theater today. Damn, Jamie Foxx is good. The ending was typical Hollywood cheese, but don’t let that stop you from seeing it.

By the way, if you want a Wurlitzer electric piano like you saw in the movie, contact my sister. I don’t know how much she’s charging for it. Two keys don’t work properly.

You don’t 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 care how it’s going.

We’ll call this Annoyance #55.

It’s not really a pet peeve, but it’s slightly irritating: People who, in passing, ask, “What’s up?” or “How’s it going?”

Don’t ask such a question unless you want an answer!

In order to point this out, I began to respond with, “You don’t care.” But that usually resulted in guilt-ridden people stopping in their tracks to find out what actually was up with me—see, such an answer implies that there’s something seriously wrong and that I’m feeling alone and unloved. I don’t feel that way at all; I was only trying to make a point, and I wind up accused of being in denial.

Okay, so now I’m back to the semi-automatic responses “Not a lot” and “Better than average.” Smart-ass remarks don’t get the response I want; and I can’t fix ’em.

Tell you a funny story about fixing people, though. Dad has a bad habit of trying to fix people. For the longest time he was trying to get Burger King employees to stop asking him if he wanted cheese on that or fries with that.

“You want cheese on that?” they’d ask him when he ordered a Whopper.

“You mean a cheese-Whopper?” he’d say.

“Yes.”

“Did I ask if I wanted cheese on that?” he’d say.

This would make them hesitant to ask him if he wanted fries with that, but they’d ask it anyway because they have to. I worked for Burger King once, and the managers would tear you a new one if you don’t.

“Did I ask for fries?” he’d say.

“I can’t go to fast food restaurants with you anymore,” I told him. “God forbid I order the same thing as you and I wind up with the huge glob of spit in my food.”

Eventually Dad realized he was just frustrating the employees unnecessarily and stopped doing it. This happened regardless of my comments about hock-laced Whoppers. He just had to come to this conclusion on his own.

And yet we still have Christians that are convinced that nagging apologetics converts people…

My hall is becoming all kinds of strange.

The guys are starting to crack. Wanna make them crack faster?

I was fixing lesson plans all day. My brain hurts.

The noises from my hall are occasionally disturbing. Not annoying; disturbing. There is a lot of screaming, a lot of shouting, occasional wrestling (smack ’em if you like ’em, remember?) and lately the guys next door have decided to sing Johnny Mathis songs. In harmony. It’s like living in a freakin’ musical.

I’ve seen weirder, though.

My new favorite prank:

Go up to people and say, "Did you hear the latest about the election?"

"What about it?" they’ll say.

"They finished counting the absentee ballots in two states," you respond. "It flipped their electoral votes over and now John Kerry is president."

Watch them flail like fish in a boat.

Dang, it’s funny.

Don’t leave them hanging too long, though. Some of these right-wing nutjobs are so temperamental they’ll smack you for even suggesting such a thing. But it’s still just so dang funny. Especially since in the Bethany Bubble, people know nothing.

The Halloween freak show.

I can’t recommend visiting Santa Cruz on Halloween, though.

Sunday my sister and I went to watch the Halloween freak show in downtown Santa Cruz. Man, I’ve never seen so many people dressed as prostitutes in all my life… if that’s what they were dressed as… if they were only dressed as prostitutes. I went as God.

Most of the people were in no discernible costume. (Me, fr’instance.) They were just dressed ridiculously or outrageously. (Then there were the guys dressed as Jay and Silent Bob, whom the people in my group simply didn’t recognize because they’d never seen the movies.) Halloween is the perfect opportunity for freaks to be themselves and get away with it. So they did.

Makes you wonder how many people out there save their freakdom for days like Halloween? With me, what you see is pretty close to what you get; I’m still trying to get the two to match. It’s called integrity, you see.