It’s the most lyingest time of the year.
A whole lot of lying to children goes on this time of year. You know what I’m talking about: The whole Santa Claus thing.
I have no issue with Santa per se. I like the Santa stories; The Santa Clause was particularly hilarious, although the sequel was stupid. Santa makes a great decoration. But convincing children that he actually comes to their house on Xmas Eve and leaves presents behind…
Every year, dumbass newspaper publishers around the country reprint Frank Church’s “Yes, Virginia, There Is a Santa Claus” letter from 1897, in which Church heartwarmingly lies to an eight-year-old reader of the New York Sun. Every year, people watch Miracle on 34th Street and see how a judge manages to twist the law in order to justify calling some loveable nut “Santa Claus.” Even the U.S. Postal Service lists guidelines about sending things to Santa. Want some hard proof that our government lies to the citizens? Here y’are. Adults across America get involved in this giant conspiracy to deceive children.
I see absolutely no justification in misleading anyone, especially children. I know it’s meant to be innocent fun, but there’s nothing innocent at all about deliberately deceiving anyone. Especially children. They’ll believe anything. Lying to them about Santa takes advantage of their innocence, all for the sake of some adult fun that really has nothing at all to do with actual childhood wonder. Real wonder is when a kid discovers amazing things like falling stars and butterfly cocoons and newborn kittens and how Kool-aid powder makes water balloons more interesting. Santa is all about artificial wonder.
My dad was particularly huge on the Santa thing. As an atheist, Santa is the only wonder he sees in Xmas; he has no use for anything Jesus-related. The idea that God became human is lost on him; he thinks the whole thing is a big fraud. So what was his alternative? Fraud.
I was annoyed by the whole thing when I found out. I had a hard enough time in school without looking like an idiot because my dad decided it was amusing for his seven-year-old to believe in Santa. I told my siblings the truth, which greatly annoyed Dad, especially after I told my sister Kerry the truth about Santa when she was two. I don’t think it ruined the wonder of Xmas for her; she’d have to tell you. Considering she’s a lot less messed-up than I am, maybe it didn’t.
Xmas 2003 was particularly difficult because I had a roomful of fourth graders, and not all of them had been informed yet by their parents about the fraud. (This didn’t stop them from informing one another.) I was frustrated because I couldn’t tell them the truth without getting an earful from their parents. I could honestly tell them that Santa is real; but I couldn’t fully explain that he was a Turkish Christian who died several centuries ago without opening up a huge can of worms. So I did the same thing I did when they asked me about how babies are made: “Ask your parents.” It’s kind of a subtle way of telling them the truth; when your answer to “Does Santa really bring presents on Christmas?” is “Ask your parents,” kids usually deduce that Santa doesn’t.
Hey, what can I tell you? I don’t lie to children.
I suspect a lot of the long-term effects of all this lying is the insane commercialism we see this time of year, particularly since a lot of it is centered on the Santa Claus myths. And then there’s the lack of trust in adults that the children inevitably develop about the same time their parents have finally told them the truth about Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, and all the other childhood myths they’ve perpetuated. Suddenly everything you tell your fifth-grader is answered with, “Nuh-uh!” You try to explain how something works and for no apparent reason they don’t believe you. What’s up with that? Think the two aren’t related? Please.
Christians in particular need to recognize that the two don’t go together. There’s nothing wrong with Santa so long as we tell the truth about him and keep him in perspective. All this lying does is put him in the center of Xmas when we’re supposed to be doing that with Jesus.